How Will Unwed Pregnant Women Change the World?

Through the way we talk about them. Birth moms, what needs to change? How can we shift the way we’ve been talking about you? And the way we've been serving you? For some adoptees, we’re born and then for most of our lives we hear some form of the script, “She couldn’t take care of you, so she gave you...[ read more ]

How Do We Prepare for Adoption Awareness Month?

I almost fell out! I snapped this photo just before my spouse grabbed me😅🙏 We of course signed up for a sailboat tour expecting a relaxing treat, smooth ride and maybe a break from "real life." Server to come around with wine and snacks, we’d enjoy the view and embrace this picturesque moment together. However, it was so windy the...[ read more ]

FAQ: Inside the Mind of Your Counselor

Hello!! It can feel a bit strange to begin working with someone you've just met, right? Here are some questions that have been important for families to know about me as they consider choosing an adoption-informed therapist/counselor. Read along, and at the end you'll get to let me know what I've missed! 1. Could you share a specific case example...[ read more ]

Discussion Guide: Angela Tucker on Red Table Talk

This post is inspired by a recent episode of Red Table Talk (S2:E15 - Raised By White Parents: A Black Adoptee Speaks) Our discussion guide will help your family think and talk about adoption, trans-racial adoption, race, culture, and birth family; challenging us to shift our thinking (and actions) about our personal and global participation in the adoption narrative. You...[ read more ]

Healing isn’t a Place; it’s a Relationship

Emotional healing doesn’t happen in one place, at one time. It’s not confined to four walls and doesn’t always submit to a particular schedule or “treatment plan.” It does happen within the warmth, security and trust of a good relationship. Can you help someone experience that if you don't have a degree or specialized training? I wrestle with the assumptions...[ read more ]

Homeland Journey: What did You Expect?

Sometimes, children who are adopted trans-racially get to return to their place of birth at some point in their life. There are many circumstances that would facilitate that. There are also many reasons why a person would feel completely satisfied staying right where they are, feeling indifferent or even a sense of avoidance at the thought of "returning." For me,...[ read more ]

Helping Your Child Through Distress

"The more I learn about you, the more I care about you." What would it look like for you to pursue this kind of heart for the ones you love today? When our children come to us for help after a significantly stressful event, we feel the depth of their circumstance because we understand the person who’s reaching out. We’ve...[ read more ]

When Should We Talk About Birth Family?

Hi Rebecca, Recently I posted a response to a question, "When should we start talking about birth family?"   I said it's individual/unique to each family, I'd want to know a bit more about the family situation, what it means for everyone involved, etc. You brought up an excellent point, "People should always have ongoing discussions." And I do generally...[ read more ]

You Don’t Look Like Your Parents

Our friend, who submitted this question during a Q&A, is dealing with a common interaction in which someone curious about adoption wonders aloud about a particular layer of another person’s adoption experience. For me, my response to statements like these over the years has become more about the person asking than about me. At first, I’d feel a little awkward,...[ read more ]

Identity Exploration: How Do I Support My Adopted Teen?

Dear Rebecca, Thanks again for submitting your question! Here are some intitial thoughts/guiding ideas to help you get started as you seek to support your teen through this shift in their identity; where they once "rejected being Asian" they now question the loss of their "original culture and language." You asked, "How can I best emotionally support my teen as...[ read more ]

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